Mixed media art inspired by gender diversity under the concept of ‘my world "

Abstract

The acceptance of gender diversity in the family, the definition of my identity, and feelings of strangeness, concealment, and liberation—all these desires for self-identity, accumulated throughout a lifetime, are expressed through my artwork. These works depict gender identity hidden within my mind and the discomfort received from family members. This is the internal drive that I aim to express through my art. The inspiration for this work began with a physical transformation of myself, as part of my dissertation titled “Mixed Media Art Inspired by Gender Diversity under the Concept of ‘My World’.” It reflects my desire to free myself from the emotional constraints caused by the discomfort from my physical appearance. The artwork conveys my negative feelings and perspectives as someone with gender diversity, and aims to create interactive activities for viewers through my artwork, allowing them to engage with the concept from the perspective of someone who embodies gender diversity. The concept for creating my work is rooted in the desire to convey the emotional journey tied to my gender identity. It draws from my experience of feeling "alienated" in a female body, a gender I was born with, while having to "conceal" my desire to be male. This journey culminates in a sense of "liberation." By combining these three key emotions—alienation, concealment, and liberation—I develop the concept and creation of my artwork. I want to convey my personal story through mixed media art, creating concepts that reflect my feelings and negative attitudes as someone with gender diversity, particularly regarding acceptance within the family. This work aims to connect with the inner emotions and to create interactive experiences for the viewers to engage with this series. The goal is to support and reflect on the feelings toward gender-diverse groups in society. By creating mixed media art, I intend to support these concepts and respond to my own negative feelings and attitudes by sharing them publicly. The creative process is inspired by personal experiences, built from recorded stories and past physical transformations documented in a personal diary. By combining this information with deeply held negative emotions that have accumulated over time, I aim to create and present artworks that serve as a representation to give meaning and support to these concepts. These elements come together to form this body of artwork. The outcome after holding the exhibition showed that the artwork, presented and installed in a concrete manner, allowed both family and the public to sense the concealed desire to be male that was hidden within. This was expressed through gestures, sitting postures, and even being tied with ropes, which brought the hidden feelings out powerfully. The feeling of having to conceal this desire and the overwhelming need to be male were vividly portrayed in "Ai Beer," a large-scale piece that reflected the magnitude of my emotions. The desire to be male, confined within one's own body, creates an intense feeling of discomfort, forcing an individual to repress these desires within their mind. This restraint causes a transfer of emotions from the past to the present, ultimately forming a great sense of emotional turmoil. This turmoil is represented by a sculpture wrapped in canvas, which evokes a feeling of constriction and unease. The stitches sewn into the fabric reflect the emotional pain experienced during the creation process, as if each stitch represents a deep emotional wound in my heart. However, this feeling carried over to the “Beer Noi” artwork, which represents the desire for masculinity that wants to surface. This desire wasn’t recent but formed from the time in the womb, with a clear sense of the desire to be male from 1 to 9 months in gestation. Even though masculinity was seen as something foreign and had to be repressed, it eventually broke free from the constraints of the womb. This is depicted as a life-sized doll sculpture, symbolizing the journey from birth to this moment. The “World of Beer” work consists of a set of photographs from live performances and bound clothing pieces. They were displayed after the live performances, in line with the idea of “liberation” from past feelings. All of these works were exhibited together to accomplish the creative objectives mentioned earlier.